Carl Moss
Carlton "Carl" Moss (born September 26, 1948; age 50) is the principal of Tom Landry Middle School. Carl attended Tom Landry Middle and Arlen High and was on the same football team as Hank, Boomhauer, and Bill. In the episode "Bwah My Nose", Moss was seen playing center defending Boomhauer, who played quarterback. While usually only appearing in a few scenes on occasion, Moss has had more extended roles in some episodes: in "Bill Gathers Moss," he's seen living with Bill. In some episodes, diplomas on the wall of his office include a Doctor of Education from a fictional institution. On numerous occasions, it is suggested that Moss has profoundly changed as a person since he was younger, presumably solely because of his job as principal. In "Little Horrors of Shop," Hank insinuates that Moss was once handy with shop tools, and has since lost this ability. Moss has become more obedient and bureaucratic since he was younger. He justified his blind obedience to the irrational demands of school board as a necessary part of his job. He frequently rejects staff demands for better teaching aids, citing budget cuts; he once referred to wood being used in shop class as a "fancy teaching aid" that the school simply could not afford. At one point, in lieu of finding creative solutions to the problems that arise at school Moss simply resigns and says, "my hands are tied", although this was short-lived. In "The Powder Puff Boys" Principal Moss fakes a heart attack in order to avoid casting a tie-breaking vote at the Tom Landry PTA meeting. Moss is the center of various minor scandals at Tom Landry Middle. He had numerous vending machines which dispensed only sugary beverages, installed to for the sole purpose of raising money for a staff vacation. Additionally, he once placed below-average (but not learning disabled) students into special education classes so they would not have to take standardized state exams, thereby fraudulently raising the school's grade for the No Child Left Behind Act. There have been numerous suggestions that Moss' personal life is quite miserable; he briefly lives with Bill, he is an alcoholic as evidenced in several episodes, and is caught living in the school after being kicked out of his house. He has few aspirations, once noting that being a principal is "all I'm qualified for," though he appears to have diplomas from Brown University and Heimlich Community College in No Bobby Left Behind. He was briefly suspended from his principal job in one episode, taking on a gig selling steaks. It is unknown if he was successful at this job or how long his suspension lasted. On July 17th, 2013, Moss's voice actor Dennis Burkley passed away. Appearances * Season 2 ** Hilloween ** Bobby Slam * Season 3 ** To Spank, with Love * Season 4 ** Little Horrors of Shop ** Old Glory * Season 6 ** Bobby Goes Nuts * Season 7 ** The Good Buck ** I Never Promised You an Organic Garden ** The Witches of East Arlen * Season 8 ** Cheer Factor * Season 12 ** Bobby Rae ** The Powder Puff Boys ** The Courtship of Joseph's Father * Season 13 ** No Bobby Left Behind ** Bwah My Nose ** Bill Gathers Moss ** When Joseph Met Lori, and Made Out with Her in the Janitor's Closet Category:Characters Category:Males Category:Minor characters Category:Tom Landry Middle Employees Category:Hanks Buddies Category:Bill's Roommates Category:Season 2 Category:Season 3 Category:Season 4 Category:Season 5 Category:Season 6 Category:Season 7 Category:Season 8 Category:Season 9 Category:Season 10 Category:Season 11 Category:Season 12 Category:Season 13 Category:Characters with Glasses